Nerd Night
Plot Simon discovers a secret about Michael, Emma sets Molly up with one of her friends. Rating: TV-MA *Graphic Violence *Adult Content *Adult Language Characters *Simon *Thomas *Molly *Alice *Michael *Emma *Veronica *Hopkins (Antagonist) *Blue (Cameo) Transcript 6:50 PM On a Sunday (Opens with a camera closeup of Simon's face holding a bowling ball in Ball Busters) Michael: You ready man? Simon: Hold on, I'm concentrating. (Simon rolls the bowling ball down the floor and it hits ten empty beer bottles) Simon: Nice! I told you I can drink ten beers and still get a strike. Michael: Lucky you. Simon: Pay up, that's twenty dollars. (Michael gives Simon twenty dollars, and Alice enters the room with her hair all long) Michael: Holy Shit, Alice what did you do? Alice: I let down my hair, I decide to change it up. Simon: You had extra hair? Alice: Yeah, it was all tied back the whole time, you just didn't notice it. Michael: Well, you're now about ten times hotter than you already are. Alice: (Blushes and giggles for a second) Thanks, I just wish this would get the eyes of all the boys. Simon: I think there's some horny tweens across the street who would just explode to see you naked. Alice: And… that just killed the moment. Michael: Well I got to go. Simon: Where are you going? Michael: (Quickly) I got things to do, bye. (Michael leaves, as Thomas approaches Simon and Alice) Thomas: Man, tonight's dead, can we close early? Alice: Why do you want to leave early? Thomas: Because I got a huge exam tomorrow for medical school, and I need to get reading on how to perform surgery on a person's lower body half. Simon: Do you think Michael is hiding something? Alice: (Whispers to Thomas) Oh no, Simon is gonna drag us into some stupid adventure. Simon: Wait a minute. Why did he want to leave early? Thomas: Maybe he had something important to take care of tonight. Simon: Well, he was acting very quick about it. Alice: Why does it matter to you? Simon: Because I'm bored with Michael leaving, let's go follow him, come on. Alice: (To Thomas) Told you. (Simon, Thomas, and Alice leave and get into Simon's truck) Thomas: How will you know where he is? Simon: Oh shit, I didn't think this through. Alice: (Slaps on Simon's back head) Dumbass. Simon: Wait, I got it! Thomas: What? Simon: (Pulls out his phone) I'll call Michael and tell him that I need to meet him somewhere, then I'll lie about some bullshit and you two can sneak around his car to see what is up with him. Thomas: Simon, you are crazy. Simon: I know. (Simon dials Michael's number on his phone and begins to talk to him on the phone) Simon: (On the phone) Hey Michael, I need to talk to you, it's an emergency, and I promise you I'm not drunk, I swear. Michael: (On the other line) Alright I believe you, how about we meet outside the parking lot of Maulmart. Simon: (On the phone) Great, see you there in a quickie. (Simon hangs up and puts his phone away) Simon: Fasten you're seat belts, we're going to Maulmart. (Simon slams on the gas pedal and drives away on the street, it then cuts to Molly in Simon's office on her phone, sitting in her desk) Molly: (Reading Simon's text message) Hey Molly, close up the club, I'm on a new adventure with Thomas and Alice, and I promise I'm not drunk, yolo. (Door knocks and Emma comes in) Emma: Hey bitch! Molly: Hey Emma, looks like I got tonight off, since you're drunk brother is doing something stupid. Emma: Hey, whenever Simon is doing something it is maybe stupid, but it's also pretty awesome. Molly: Whatever, (Sighs) you know, ever since I came out of the closet like a month and a half ago, I haven't' been able to find a good girl to be with. Emma: Well, this city isn't crowded with lesbians, unless maybe my bitch Stacy is somehow going to be part of a threesome with some random girl. Molly: I hate to say this, but do you have any gay friends? Emma: (Thinking) Hold on this will take a second. (Cuts to a timecard saying three minutes later) Emma; (While smoking crack) Okay, I have a friend who is somehow famous for doing something and she goes to the same dealer as me, I think I can hook you up. Molly: (Laughing hard) Why not, hook me up like a fishing rod, holy shit that was awful! (Molly and Emma laugh hard for several seconds, it then cuts to Simon driving in his truck at high speed, with Simon and Alice in the backseat, and Simon is listening and singing along to Fuckin' Problems) Simon: (Singing) I love bad bitches, that's my fucking problem, And yeah I like to fuck I got a fucking problem, (repeats same line two times) If finding somebody real is your fucking problem, Bring ya girls to the crib maybe we can solve it) Thomas: (Yells) Simon calm down! Simon: Calm down, what is it you're time of the month. (Simon's truck stops in the parking lot outside of Maulmart) Simon: Where the fuck is he? Alice: You know, you could do something called waiting. Simon: Alright genius thanks for the suggestion. (Simon pulls out some tissues out of his glove department) Alice: Are you kidding me!? Thomas: (Disgusted) Shit man, don't jerk off in front of us. Simon: What are you talking about? (Simon blows his nose with one of the tissues, Thomas and Alice sigh with relieve) Simon: I usually blow my nose before I blow off my dick if you know what I mean? Thomas & Alice: (Disgusted) Ugh! (Thomas and Alice exit the truck, as car lights approach the truck) Thomas: (Whispers to Alice) Oh shit, is that Michael. Alice: (Whispers to Thomas) It's either him or some random stranger looking to buy some random shit at this Maulmart at the most random time. (Thomas looks at Alice with an odd expression) Alice: What? I always wanted to say that, even if it makes me sound like a black chick. Thomas: Let's hide. (Thomas and Alice hide behind Simon's truck, as Michael parks his car and gets out, he then approaches Simon's truck) Michael: (Taps on the driver window) Simon! Simon: Oh shit, Michael I was just about to pleasure myself until you showed up. Michael: Great to know, can you come outside? (Simon leaves his truck) Michael: So what is it you need to talk to me about in such a hurry? Simon: Um, listen we need to spend some more time together. (Thomas and Alice slowly walk over to Michael's car and approach the trunk) Michael: What do you mean? We hang out all the time. Simon: I mean, all we do is drink, we should go on a journey. Michael: (Confused) What kind of journey? (Simon and Alice open the trunk to Michael's car) Thomas: What the fuck is all this? Alice: Looks like a bunch of space themed stuff. (Thomas and Alice close the trunk, but are too loud and Michael hears them) Michael: (Shocked & Surprised) What the fuck is going on with you guys? Alice: What's going on with you and all this space junk in you're car? Michael: (Sighs for a few seconds) Alright, you guys have already found out enough, so here you go. I go to Stars Wars conventions every few months. Simon, Thomas, & Alice: What? Michael: Yes, you can say that I'm kinda of a nerd for space themed movies. Simon: How long have you been a fan? Michael: Since middle school, that's why by High School I decided to never tell you because it was the first time I had real friends. Simon: I can tell. Thomas: (To Michael) Michael, you're twenty seven years old and you have plenty of friends, it's okay. Michael: Really? Thomas: Yeah, I mean probably none of us care, but we won't judge you. Michael: (Sighs) Alright, well I got to go. (Michael gets in his car and leaves, as Simon, Thomas, and Alice get in Simon's truck) Simon: (Starts the engine) Wonder why he wouldn't tell us? Alice: It's Star Wars, it's full of crazy nerds who probably have never gotten laided. Thomas: (To Alice) What's with you Alice? Alice: Sorry, it's just that nerds make me uncomfortable, especially when people compare me to Blue. Simon: We got to follow him. Thomas: (To Simon) What? Why? Simon: I've never been to one of those conventions, I wanna see why people would go to those things. Thomas: And I'm guessing me and Alice have no other choice? Simon: Yep. (Simon drives away quickly into the street, as it then cuts to Molly and Emma sitting at a table in Mc Arnolds and Emma is shown with Red eyes eating a plate stuffed with cheeseburgers) Molly: Can I… Emma: (Demonic voice) NO!!!!! (Suddenly a yellow woman with long wavy hair walks in and approaches Molly and Emma) Yellow Woman: Emma is that you bitch? Emma: (Demonic voice) YES!!!!!! (Switches back to normal) It's me. Yellow Woman: I see you're still smoking crack. Emma: Fuck yeah I am. (Points toward Molly) Molly this is Veronica. Molly: So this is the girl you were talking about? Emma: Yes, Veronica is full on lesbian. Veronica: It's true, since College when I found out all men were the same. Molly: Amen to that. (Veronica sits down next to Emma) Molly: So Veronica what you do for a living? Veronica: I'm a model for the magazine "Dicks and Divas" here in the city. Molly: What's it like to be a model? Veronica: Well, for starters I can't eat anything greasy, fatting, or anything considered delicious. Molly: (Surprised) Oh, well Emma wanted to come here because it was either this or she would eat my head. Veronica: Alright I'll let you off there, but just to let you know you that I'm on a nonstop crazy calorie diet. Molly: I'll remember that. Veronica: So I've been modeling ever since I got out of college, where I really wanted to be a professional photographer, but I found out that I look sexy so I decided to model. Molly: And you then worked for Dicks and Divas? Veronica: Yes, I'm twenty four and make good money in my cute apartment uptown. Molly: Great, well I'm twenty three and work as a personal assistant at the nightclub "Ball Busters" I worked there after hiding out. Veronica: Hiding from what? Molly: I can't really say, it's kinda of illegal. Veronica: (Playful) I forgot to tell you, Dangerous behavior turns me on. Molly: (Whispers to Veronica) I killed a dance instructor. (Molly and Veronica stare at each other for a few seconds then start making out on the table) Emma: Man I'm a great matchmaker. (Cuts to Simon, Thomas, and Alice walking up to a stadium with a banner on the front that says "Star Wars Fans Unite") Alice: God, I'm so nervous. Simon: Don't worry you're probably gonna be the hottest girl there. Alice: It's not that, it's just that this place feels so bloated, weird, and confusing. Thomas: (To Alice) We just need to stay together. Simon: I may get lost checking all this shit out. Thomas: (To Simon) Really? (Simon, Thomas, and Alice enter the stadium, where there are plenty of booths, people in star wars costumes and two spaceships hanging in the air, with the song Level 19 playing in the background) Simon: No wonder Michael kept this a secret, there are no hot chicks here I wanna bone. (Cuts to Blue at a booth) Blue: Awww sweet, they have the Luke Skywalker limited addition action figure, this time with a green lightsaber, this just got totally yoda. (Cuts back to Simon, Thomas, and Alice) Alice: See, this is what worries me about these conventions, I have no idea what all this means. Thomas: (To Alice) Relax, we just need to find Michael. Simon: He never told us what he does here. Thomas: Wait, when me and Alice were looking in his trunk, we saw a blue stick that looks like it could light up. Simon: Maybe it's for a dual he's involved in? Thomas: Maybe. Alice: Guys, there's a sign over that might answer you're question. (Simon, Thomas, and Alice approach a sign on a wall that points to the arena and says "Star Wars dual tonight, bring you're own lightsabers") Simon: I'm guessing he's in a dual tonight. Thomas: Let's go. (Simon, Thomas, and Alice go inside the arena, as it cuts to Molly and Veronica outside Veronica's apartment and the two are kissing) Veronica: (Suddenly opens the door and goes inside) We should do this again sometime. Molly: (Confused) What? I thought we'd… Veronica: Oh no, I don't have sex on the first date. Molly: Wait a minute, that was a date? All we did was make out in a fast food place for twenty minutes. Veronica: Sweetie, I got a much different take on dating, goodnight. (Veronica goes inside her apartment, it then cuts to Molly walking outside and calling Emma) Molly: (On the phone with Emma) Hey Emma, thanks for Veronica, I think I'm officially going out with her. Emma: (On the phone with Molly) Told you I could hook you up, I'm not just some bitch who smokes. Molly: (On the phone with Emma) Well I'll see you tomorrow night. (Molly hangs up the phone and walks away, it then cuts to Simon, Thomas, and Alice sitting down in the stands) Simon: Wow, lot of people here for something this underground. Thomas: Wonder why Michael would participate in this? Alice: Maybe he likes to pretend he has a secret identity from everyone? (The lights dim) Simon: Wait, I think it's about to begin. Voiceover: In a galaxy far, far, away, two jedi's decide to dual it out to prove who is the greater Jedi. Simon: (Whispers) This shit makes no sense at all. Voiceover: Introducing Michael the Leader of the Star Troopers. (Michael enters the arena in a white cloak and a blue lightsaber and the crowd cheers) Simon: That's Michael? Alice: Wow, he looks kinda badass. Voiceover: And introducing his opponent, the leader of the Sith, Hopkins. (A dark red man with a black cloak enters the arena with a red lightsaber, and the crowd cheers even louder) Alice: Do you think those things are real? Simon: I don't know, but I want one. Voiceover: The rules are simple, if you're hit in the chest, you are of course dead. (The lights spotlight on Michael and Hopkins) Voiceover: Ready, Set, (Waits a few seconds) Battle. (Michael and Hopkins clash lightsabers, and begin to clash they're lightsabers several times, they both bow down twice when lightsabers almost hit them) Simon: This is exciting, I didn't know those things could look so deadly. (Michael clashes with Hopkins lightsaber and trips back and hits the ground) Thomas: Oh shit. Alice: Michael is about to lose… wait where's Simon? (Simon stabs Hopkins in the back with a sword and Hopkins falls down dead with a puddle of blood around his body) Simon: (To Michael) You're welcome. Michael: What!? Michael this is all pretend, the lightsaber wasn't gonna kill me. Simon: So I really killed this guy? Michael: Yes! (Simon picks up Michael and the two run out of the arena as the crowd is heard gasping) Thomas: Well you should be happy now. Alice: Why? Thomas: Because we'll probably never come to one of these conventions again. (Suddenly Hopkins dead body is sucked into the ground and the ground becomes a giant hole with red blood pouring out and a stump appears with a man in black cloak) Hopkins: (Demonic Voice towards the crowd especially Thomas and Alice) This isn't the last time you'll see me! (Hopkins, the stump, and the hole disappear as it quickly gets sucked into the ground) Alice: Well it looks like we have a new enemy. Directed By AndrewBrauer Written By AndrewBrauer '-Lightshow Episode 9-' What did you think about this episode? Dogshit (1/5) Okay (2/5) Good (3/5) Terrific (4/5) A personal favorite (5/5) Trivia *Michael reveals to Simon, Thomas, and Alice that he loves Star Wars. *The first appearance of Veronica and Hopkins. *It's revealed that Alice is highly against anything Nerdy, we means she despises Star Wars or anything space themed. *Molly and Veronica are officially going out as a couple. *Alice has officially changed her hair from short to long hair. *Molly's first time smoking crack. *Emma enjoys eating at Mc Arnolds. *Dangerous behavior turns Veronica on. *It's revealed that Michael is twenty seven, it also reveals that Molly is twenty three. Nerd Night.jpg|Michael with a lightsaber. Nerd Night2.jpg|Simon and Michael outside of Maulmart. Category:Episodes Category:Lightshow Category:February Releases